Wednesday, April 1, 2015

Signs or the Subconscious? Why ask? I'm paying attention either way!Part 2.

Continued from .....Signs or the Subconscious? Why ask? I'm paying attention either way! Part 1.

The canvas I bought reminded me of how this year is about balance and my father. That and the pretty serene nature of her and her colorful hair sealed the purchase.

My dad would have turned 69 in February  (the water sign-his self proclaimed "home" was the ocean.) this year. 2015 has been a time for re-balancing of sorts, so I figured my subconscious must have seen the "69" in the circular sign of Aquarius and thereby, explained it's gravitational pull on me. Makes sense, no?

The art of reading signals of fate makes me giddy. I honestly, believe all the magnificent balances, small miracles, or karmic retribution bend and bounce around all of us. It's a slight talent (triviality?) not only to notice, but interpret such subtle shifts (gifts?) I look for the hints in the hidden or the nudges in the "nothing in particular" to most.

The empty half of the Master bedroom, recently "converted"
to my Serenity Corner. (poster, framed pic of my Dad etc..)
Lately, the eerie thunderbolts or tiny taps are presenting themselves in bounty. I journal a lot of my life, but there is also a sacredness in the secret-keeping of such mini miracles.We all laugh these "signs" away in mock-embarrassment or share only with those worthy of such fascinating parts of all of our lives.

Before I meditate, in my "serenity corner" of the master bedroom, I take the pen, notebook and incense out. On the paper I scribble down a one-sentence description of that snapshot of my life, date it, and then write whatever theme/intention comes to mind. Some days it's simple: "Release the negative." and that's all I can do.

The "box" and example of a list
with the Raku angel from Colorado.

Other days, I have huge intentions: "Gratitude to the ENTIRE universe, and send healing light to _____, and then I list whomever comes to mind for a "thank you" or some "energetic love and light" in their direction.

The list has never been less than at least ten people, sometimes goes on for pages. I then re-read it, fold it, and it put it in the cute little box I bought at Cost Plus World Market. I clarify that because I predict my middle child will say "it's an heirloom passed through generations of the family" long after I'm dead. That's fine too.

Two weeks ago, I was going through my little routines, and a few crazy things revealed themselves to me. As I was facing the canvas of the Goddess, I noticed in the the peace sign were some images:
- a tree sapling sprouting from a rock
- Stonehenge

This intrigued me because my mother, who only recently has become a daily part of my life serving as a touchstone in the storms. She is quite obsessed with trees (and rocks) so I thought it strange and perfect. Stonehenge is in the town my parents met, and therefore that image is strangely familiar and symbolic of my gratitude to them for conceiving me.

I stopped and started to inspect the entire intricate image more closely. I had only recently found myself obsessed with Anais Nin, and her journals detailing her life in France, and had made some connections with experts on the subject matter, so this was perfectly weird as well:

In her pant leg, it says: Maintenance il est! "The time is now." in French.

Things I still haven't figured out:

-What does the bumble bee or lady bug represent?
-White doves?

Who knows. Not me! I do know this....either my subconscious predicted I'd discover Anais and connect with an expert on her life who would inspire me, and it also recognized the tree, Stonehenge and henna (Arabic and Indian) on her legs. OR....little "ah-ha" moments are turning into small signals of validation that I am perhaps on the right track?

From a place of trust, and love and belief in your journey, try peeling back a few layers. Look around with the wondrous magical eyes of a child that hasn't been taught that magic and miracles do NOT exist. I'm not trying to convince anyone. I don't need to. I've always been in love with the idea of destiny and fate and sure, it helps to deal with the harder moments in life to just breathe and consider that everything happens for a reason, and that reason is not always clear, but with gratitude, some positive ju-ju and an open heart, I truly believe anything is possible.

Maybe I'm nuts. I've been called worse. But, maybe.....just maybe. I'm not. 
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