Wednesday, February 25, 2015

An open poem to the fearers of failure , with a hug and kiss blown from me to you.

Hi. My name is Lulu, I have failed. A lot. In love, in friendship, in work, in obligation, in planning and not planning, in small motherhood moments, in my daughter role, at PTA, in marriage, in grief, in meditation, in promises (to myself and others) in tennis matches, in classrooms, in conversations, at self-preservation, in moral rules, in public, internally...I have failed, and I choose to follow up with grace....

I know my failures make you squirm, needing to be wiped away, scrubbed off like a germ.
I remind you of your fallibility, she's a slippery slope of the human condition to change; or to cope.
It's easier to cast glares, and guffaw, than to empathize,
Its harder to connect with me when I've shed my disguise.
The meanings you give my falls come from the same place that makes you feel tall.
Fearing gets me nowhere, failing is a feeling, living is to feel, and I love my life.

You know my faults are good fodder, the tongue that spits fire, doesn't swallow
You remind me of those lemmings, in line, busy staying in line to follow.
Its easier to lean away than to lean in and understand.
It's harder to have compassion and offer your hand.
The meanings you give my demise, come from the same place you fight compromise.
Fearing gets me nowhere, failing is a feeling, living is to feel and I love my life.

What if failing has taught me things? Given me wings? Let me fly and be me.

What if failing is falling into your truth and seeking the real way to be?

What if failing brought me the beauty of a place I couldn't see?

What if failing, like tides, wash in to smooth, and pull back to soothe?

Fearing gets me nowhere, failing is a feeling, and living is to feel....

I see you too, and fear is fair. I send you positive light, and love for when you're there.
We are not laid out to be counted, flaws or burdens to bare.
I'll hug your softer self, the mailable hidden fears realized to be true.
I love with whole heart, the failure in me, and the failure in you.
What I discovered from falling so many times is that there is little difference between the two.

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